I’ve been writing a lot this week.
I also feel like I made a break-through or two in the process. Specifically, I’ve once again accessed a level of inner darkness I’d lost touch with for some time. Part of that is some stuff I won’t write here, because to be honest, I can’t explain it in a less than weird way without you reading Well Country first. And as that book comes out next month, I won’t be delving into it further in this post.
But writing this book is changing me.
Very recently, I can see my past books as themes and elements of my life at the times each of them was written.
I love the way I can look back and see how happy (Or how miserable) I was, and in which particular way each book describes my life in fantasy and science fiction terms.
That said, I don’t know if Well Country will stand that way in a few years. At first, I worried that was because it’s a sequel, the third in a series. No.
I think Well Country is becoming special to me because it’s helped me break a seal in my mind that I didn’t fully realize was there for so long.
I’m reaching for a horrid sensation, a kind of perversity that does not involve love or lust, but which centers on power that comes from failure.
Heroes have to lose sometimes. That’s as specific as I’ll get with the story.
Personality chains us to our bitterness sometimes. Just the same, my memories of how much I hated others when I was a teenager and wrote my first few books, drove me to face a different reality. Happiness. Contentment. Those are powerful feelings too, but for a book like Well Country I had to dredge my old feelings and worst thoughts.
It’s brutal, sometimes.
I’m going over the time limit here, because I have to finish this thought.
This book will be joyful and satisfying to read, as well, I hope. I’m enjoying writing it for many of the same reasons I can’t describe fully. I hope I’m making sense.
I love this book. I love this world. And I love that both of these story elements evidence pain my story inflicts on them.
A bit personal?
Yes. A bit.
I hope you readers understand how much I put into a story. It’s more than the hours of dictation or typing. It’s more than editing. The fuel is vital, too.
Thanks for reading.